September 24, Day 201

Dear Diary,
Huh? Whoa turbo. Can I say anything? Ok fine. Yes I'm still in Miami. Why are you calling me a b***h? I did no such thing. I'm always very respectful of you. I can't believe your b***h a** would call me such a thing. Our relationship works off of mutual respect you punk muthaf***a. I will f*** you up like that big a** pork chop I smashed last night. I guess I should say late last night, but it was really only 8:30 PST, which is the only time zone that matters to me. Me and the boys spent some time walking around a highly overrated South Beach. Uh, no. We weren't at the actual beach. We got out there late. It's crazy how quick the night comes on this side of the country. When you combine that with sleeping during the day, it's a wonder that you even see the sun. Yeah I saw the sun muthaf***a. Who would come to Miami and stay inside? I said no such thing. I got out and hit the pool, but while I was inside I knocked out some sit ups and push ups. Not nearly enough to work off the bulls**t I've been eating. Here's to being home in a little over 24 hours. Sad to say but I sense that there will be more desserts and junk food before that 24 hours passes. Whoa a**hole. I ate no such thing. It was just a cupcake. Kinda like you. Soft and full of s**t.