Dear Diary,
I wonder how long it takes to form a good habit. Cause its been 30 days and I'm pretty sure I've developed some new habits and changed some old ones for the better. At least I thought so. If the scale keeps tripping though, I'm gonna have to get a second opinion, which is gonna be tough. How am I gonna explain standing in someones bathroom at 6 in the morning butt a** naked. Can you say awkward? And before you cringe thinking about it diary, don't picture me as I am today. Think only of the chiseled being that I am to become again. I was there once. Tall. Ok relatively tall. Slender. Damn good looking. I'll be dat. OK, I wasn't chiseled the first time around either, but f*** off. I'm trying to make a point here. I'm trying to look so good it will make TLO proud and extremely insecure. All at the same time. I've been proud of the way she's kept in shape after dropping three little ones for me. She's showed strong determination and a ridiculous work ethic to get there. All while I walked by her when she was doing sit ups and exercise videos so I could sit down to watch tv. Getting butt a** naked forces me to look in the mirror and see how much I let myself go and its a damned shame. Especially compared to her. But in my defense, every time she got pregnant, I gained more weight than her. Just never lost any when she did. Diary you can shut the f*** up because you've gotten pretty thick around the middle too. If you keep talking s**t I can change that real fast and you're not gonna like how I do it. I will gut you like a fish, you f***ing guppy. It was after looking in the mirror one day and tipping the scale at 265.4 that I decided not to be this way anymore. So 30 days ago I made a promise to myself. I've done a pretty good job of keeping that promise too. I've lost a few pounds and while I don't love the way I look in the mirror yet, I'm liking it more each day. Even if that b***h a** scale lies and says I weigh more than I do. I swear I'm gonna bust that muthaf***a upside its head until the white metal shows if it keeps lying on me. Don't f***ing try me or I will end the both of you. But I'm not ending the new habits just because the 30 days are up. That would be stupid so I'll leave it to you dummies. No matter what the scale says this morning. You better have your lunch money, you b***h a** stack of tree flesh. I'll bury you and piss on your grave just to see you grow back. Then I'll chop you down again. The part of me that f***ing despises you will never change. See you tomorrow!
PS. Another hour on the bike last night. Sons of Anarchy makes it go down easy.
PSS. Had a salmon salad for lunch yesterday. As delicious as it was beautiful. I need to Yelp that one.
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