Dear Diary,
I miss beef and cakes. But don't be confused I don't miss beefcakes. Never had one and never will, because that would be gay. Not that there's anything wrong with that. But I digress. I think I'll make it thru as long as I take this one meal at a time. Sodas are easy to give up and I have quit many times, but my dear succulent beef, I long to chew you up and have you travel my entrails for a week. We will be together soon, just not nearly as often. And when we are, I imagine that you'll need to be in steak form, because why should I waste my time with a burger, right? Cookies, I saw you yesterday and though I could smell your sugary goodness I walked away, though I'm sure a small bite would not have hurt. The problem is there is no such thing as a small bite of you. I f***ing hate that you taste so good. Moderation where are you so that I might enjoy the fruits of your labor. Hey. Fruits been good to me this week. The trail mix was great too. I think I enjoy pistachios but I'm pretty sure as good as they tasted they'd eventually try to kill me. F***ing legumes.
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